Friday, September 26, 2014

Lightness within Darker Days

It’s that time of year again when weather changes; light changes and layers come out to keep us warm.  It’s that time of year again when traditions and aromas of childhood and warmth fill the stores and environments we occupy.

Maybe this time, the past traditions and changes  don’t fit our outlook of life woven with loss or grief. Our pockets may be laden with heavy loss.  Another change?  What can we do for ourselves as autumn shifts from the sunny days of summer to the shadowing and hibernating days of fall and winter?

 In loss, one often has “ rolled with the punches” long enough.  One has held a stiff upper lip and smiled with uttered condolences when all one wanted to do was scream like the costumed children that will soon be at your doorstep (and not the good kind of screaming with joy).

 Routine in loss can help to lessen the blows of change.  Old routines may not foot the bill but adding a different rhythm may. Below are a few suggestions that helped me after the death of my spouse.  I sought refuse through the winter with the following.  See if any strike a cord with you or if you can find a way to tweak the ideas to create a “ temporary routine” in this transitory time.  Your personal space, where you take yourself and what you place around yourself is a powerful tool in transition and healing.

Start the day with artificial sunlight.  Phillips’ go Lite is compact for travel and 15 minutes of exposure while checking emails or eating breakfast will cast potential doldrums away and help with body clock for the evening’s sleep.

Add some Chai tea or aromatic tea to create a soothing sense of home or comfort. Buy yourself a new mug with a daily affirmation or a new pattern that attracts you.

Light a candle in your personal space as a daily ritual. Essential oils are also an easy and economical aromatic tool to peak your performance or calm you down.  You may discover your senses have changed as well.

Hang crystals in the windows to catch daily sun. They create unbridled movement and unexpected play when you may not “feel” playful. Mobiles hanging from the ceiling can provide the same with a gentle breeze from a heating register or overhead fan.

Volunteer with children or take classes with people you do not know. Why?  No expectations!  You can tell your story if you want, but a fresh page requires nothing but you showing up in the form you are now.  Children and toddlers are a physical and mental refresher.

At bedtime, a new cozy robe, slippers, bedside journal and book.  These are something someone can gift to you as well.  A simple
 routine of warm milk and honey or chamomile tea and biscuit may nurture the evening and be can be an empowering new routine.

Remember your dormant resiliency. Nutrition for yourself can be found in a new routine. This is a time of storing for spring’s green growth and your own new buds.

What can you imagine?   Just add one ingredient.   Looking forward to the sprouts!

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Perception Down Under

I arrived in Belgium on 9-11, a visitor in a foreign country during a tragically tumultuous time of loss and confusion.

Last week I awoke in Australia to another civilian disaster with the same ingredients linking global grief and sorrow.  Outcries once again echoed across borders.

The television reports in Australia were somber and as factual as possible.  I was overwhelmed by the lack of “ finger pointing” and their grieving words.  This is a country of adventurers and mavericks.  Travelling is in the genes of the Aussies, encouraged by the surrounding seas.

The perspectives from “ Down Under” touched me.  The reports did not blaze away with contempt for the hundreds of countrymen lost.  They spoke of the Lost Souls.  The word soul was repeated. There was solace in that word for me and for the lives terminated so suddenly.

Reporting was compassionate and sensitive.  Loss was expressed not only for Aussie countrymen but also for all and for lost dreams.  Filtering through this “Down Under” lens of loss I sensed and experienced a reverence of explorers and deeply connected souls.

Globalization struck a new chord for me that day.  It started with the letter “C”.  Compassion without borders and communication without brisk judgment.

May we celebrate every day with personal peace while remembering our connection beyond manmade territories.


Tottering on the platform
The metal edge dented and pitted with decisions
She balances between
and propulsion

Looking to the left and right
provides no clues
She dances within
whirling in place
Her pinnacle
Her trademark in this moment

Mesmerized in its highlighted
presence upon her

Monday, June 16, 2014

LIghtening UP

Lightening swelled from below
below the concrete floor
of home, of the the belly

Lightening whirled its magic
cutting through thoughts and
items unused, neglected and dusty

Lightening swept away debris
ladened beneath the flowers of spring,
new growth of ideas

It did not sting, hurt nor destroy
It cleansed, fragrant of the storm's purification
It danced easily on the remains of previous activity
and now I dance too, knowing the tendrils of the new 
have a surface upon which to entwine and rise

Tuesday, May 6, 2014


Slip sliding away
moss underfoot
 neck of the toes craning the boots

 slowly reaching
slowly sinking
 in spirits and breath
Down, down, down

Here I am 
in the slow lane
viewing the" mundane" 
in crisp and sharp lights

Life in the slow lane
Sparkles from the glass shards 
shed in haste
Dances with the sun's gaze on
the water dripping from the faucet
in its own pace

Maybe the "to do" lists will be not the same
Maybe the lists cease to exist

Life in the slow lane
More to see
More to hear
More to be present within and without 

As I my body heals and I " rise to the occasion"
my soul will remember 

With grateful heart I return to stillness, even 
in its temporary hurt, in this temporary stillness that 
grows deeper and fuller than I could imagine

Sunday, January 5, 2014

Gladness in Sadness

Gladness in Sadness

Sadly I look at circumstances

Gladly I see what surfaces
friends, insights,information from 
the spiritual realm and elsewhere

Sadly I remember I have returned here

Gladly I see that it is simply temporary, that 
resources abound, choices remain and joy and gladness
supersede it all

Sadly I look back to what ifs or expectations

Gladly I remember that intention rises, 
fellowship reigns in abundant inspiration and love

I am Glad….in all things